Aging. It is the inevitable for all of us. As I type this I am getting older. I’ve accepted that. I’m ok with it.
With each passing decade of my life I reflect on the previous one and check the places where I have grown and where I need to continue to focus on and work on. Approaching forty was no different. My conclusions are this:
I want to live my best and most authentic life. I want to be open and honest about who I am. I read once, in one of my favorite books that “the world will only see our beauty once we reveal our scars.” I loved that and it resonated with me but the way it sat on my heart was probably not the intention of the author.
I decided that I will always reveal my scars because they are so much a part of me and who I am right now but I am unconcerned about how the world will perceive it. I also don’t have to come out “scars ablaze” if you will. I get to decide who sees what, and when and why. Not everyone deserves to hear our stories.
I’m no longer comfortable with “mincing words” so to speak. I have almost forty-one years of life experience and I’ve got thoughts and opinions that matter.
I no longer feel the need to appease or people please. The people for me will get me, love me, except me and encourage me… as I will them because the truth is we are all just trying to figure it out. We don’t have to be friends but we can lend support to each other and respect the others journey. Those that are going to love you, will love you at all cost and no matter what. Those are good people. Keep them super close.
I’m in no way, shape or form interested in keeping up with my twenty and thirty year old sister counterparts. I’ve lived through those decades. I’ll cheer you on from my forty year old position though. GO YOU!!! You’ve got this!!
My body is no longer as round or supple as it was in those decades. I have watched as it has become more angular. My breast are no longer what they were in my twenties or thirty’s, but they nourished my child and continue to bring my husband pleasure and above all that I just like them. I like that they are healthy and still there. If in reading that my candor makes you uncomfortable, I promise you will be ok.
The skin on my face has more lines and the skin on my body is thinning in other places. Is this a flaw? Absolutely not. They are simply a part of life. If you are not you should get comfortable with that quick. But it doesn’t mean to settle for it. Do what makes you feel best about you.
I am forty. My body has changed but my feelings about it are good. I’ve completely settled into my own skin and it’s really comfortable here. I eat healthy most of the time but I’m a firm believer in the occasional decadent indulgence and bag of Doritos. I exercise to keep my body and mind healthy and strong. I drink a lot of water and coffee and I also get Botox.
I read to stimulate my mind and to feed my soul. I love the people that are close to me with my whole heart and try to give them my best and when that’s not available I will give them what I have. I do yoga to be still, deep breathe and stay limber and lean because that makes me happy and it’s how I feel most comfortable.
Music and travel are crucial components to my over all wellbeing.
The crux of all of this is to say get comfortable with you. Sit with yourself for a while and just be still. What are you saying to yourself? Listen to your self talk and if it’s negative, began to feed yourself the positive truths about who you are… you are a fantastic creation, one with so much purpose and the ability to do so much good in the world and we need you to show up.
Be kind to others… Be kind to you…